Observing, Not Stalking
by BlueMoonOnTheRise
Summary: The Doctor is clamouring after someone he can't have. Donna has to snap him out of it. Bit difficult to explain without giving it away. NOT TEN/DONNA
1. A Younger Her

**New story!! Yaay!! Well I'm happy anyway. But that could be because I just ate ice cream. **

**OBSERVING, NOT STALKING**

Donna brushed her auburn hair out of her eyes, blinking in the blinding sunlight. The Doctor stepped out behind her, looking around, and pulling his long brown coat closer around him. It was cold; and frost still lingered on the grass verges where they were standing.

"Wonder why the TARDIS brought us here." the Doctor said, standing next to Donna.

"Mmm," she replied "I mean, it's just boring old London, dull grey streets, you know…"

"Hey! I love London."

She shrugged, and walked down off the curb, and crossed the road, sliding slightly. A black boy, perhaps about 18, was walking down the pathway, humming to himself. Donna ran to catch up.

"Oi! Oi you!" she slowed down as the boy turned "What date is it?"

"23rd January" he replied, continuing walking.

"No no no no! Wait! What year is it?"

The boy looked at her, raising his eyebrows sceptically. Donna met his gaze, imitating his expression. "2000" he mumbled finally, before stalking off.

By this time, the Doctor had caught up with her, and was frowning after the boy.

"I wish you wouldn't _do_ that!" he told her, annoyed. "And of all the people you could have possibly asked…" he trailed off. He didn't need a discussion with Donna about why he didn't like that particular boy. They walked along a block of houses in silence, the sound of traffic muted by the concrete. Their footsteps echoed around the square.

"Doctor?"

"Mmm"

"Why are we staying here? I mean, I can walk around London anytime I like but…"

The Doctor ignored her, sitting down on a bench. Donna copied him, raising her eyebrows in suspicion. He knew he shouldn't be doing this, it was stalking…no, Timelords don't stalk people. He was observing.

He didn't have long to wait. A group of girls came giggling up the path he and Donna had just taken. A tall dark girl with large amber eyes was eyeing up a couple of boys across the square. There were three arm in arm, giggling madly, and five more chatting. The Doctor's hearts skipped a beat. There she was. A flash of golden hair, her tongue poking out from between her teeth as she grinned at her friends, and those big gorgeous dark brown eyes…

It was, unmistakeably, a 5 year younger Rose Tyler.

**:D xxxxxx**


	2. Battling

**New chapter! Well duh, obviously, but I seem to need to write that at the start of every new chapter. :D**

**Sorta a gap filler, this one. Will have some proper action (not **_**that **_**kind of action, you dirty minded people lol) next time. OK? :)**

**rose4thedoctor x**

The Doctor's breath caught in his throat, he felt his eyes stinging as all the memories rushed back, all the blissful dream-like happiness he had floated on while she was with him, and all the pain as the universe had torn them apart. Too good to be true. Whenever something good happened, it was taken away. It all went.He blinked furiously; he didn't want Donna to see he was upset.

Later, after Donna had wondered back to the TARDIS, failing to see the attraction of sitting on a hard cold metal bench for hours. The Doctor stood up, a furious battle waging in his mind. He wanted to go and visit her. On the other hand, he wasn't sure that if he saw her at close quarters he could be held responsible for his actions. He no doubt would do something very very stupid, such as kissing her. Which was not a good idea. Well it would have been before. Particularly as she had no idea who he was, and she was only 14…

You can't walk up to a young teenager, tell them that you love them, and then…what? Hi, I'm gonna meet you in five years, looking completely different. Then I will take you round all of time and space, then a year later regenerate into the person I am now. We will be separated a year after that, and so I came back in time to tell you I loved you, because I ran out of time when you got trapped in a parallel universe.

He'd be lucky not to be arrested.

Not good.

But a conversation couldn't hurt. Not really. He set off for her flat at once.

Rose sat at the kitchen table with Mickey, a stereo blasting out music as she attempted to do some maths homework. Her forehead was creased with a little frown, her tongue sticking out in the way that it did when she was concentrating hard at something. One of her traits that Mickey (and of course the Doctor) found completely adorable.

"Here," he said, reaching out a hand for it "Let's have a look."

She threw it at him.

"Oh ok, I remember this. You have to add that I think…and then…nope…"

"Screw it," she said, getting up and kissing him as she walked past. "Mr Hadley can go screw himself. I can't do that, and I ain't gonna try." She grinned. "What you lookin' at?"

"Babe, you know you're adorable when you act like that – all…"

The doorbell rang. Rose wrinkled her nose, and went to answer it. Mum's probably forgotten her key again, she thought wryly, reaching for the door handle. She was very surprised when a man she had never seen before in her life peered around the door, smiling at her broadly.

"Rose!" he half yelled in a strangled voice, his eyes rather bright. "Um…"

"Do I know you?"

"Not yet," he told her. Oh well done Doctor, dig yourself a nice hole.

"OK," she said, looking rather nervous "Um…"

"Can I talk with you?" he asked "Alone?"

She didn't look exactly keen on that idea. He didn't really blame her. A strange man turns up at her door, yells her name like he's about to cry, and asks to talk to her. Alone.

"Uh…" was all he managed, by way of explanation. She raised her eyebrows at him, but a smile was playing around her lips. She looked like she trusted him; she always had, he remembered. Even when he ripped off her boyfriend's head. Although that hadn't made him very popular.

"Hello?" Rose said rather uncertainly, looking a little worried "D'you need something?"

_You._

"Oh no. Um. So can you come with me? For a minute?"

She nodded, seeming somewhat resigned. "OK. Mickey? Be back in a bit!" She grabbed a jacket, and followed him out of the flat.

**Like? Not like? :P**


	3. Gone insane

Rose started having second thoughts the moment she stepped out of the flat

**I am actually really enjoying writing this. It's a very different angle in this one, beacsue the 10Roseness is more one sided because she doesn't even know him yet, and a bit angsty, because he knows that whatever he tells her, he can't let her remember…so yeah, let me know if it's actually working out ok :P**

Rose started having second thoughts the moment she stepped out of the flat.

"So who exactly are you?" she asked, hurrying to keep up with him.

"I can't tell you that, unless I wipe your memory after." He told her sadly

"OK, Ok. Look, maybe I should go back now, yeah? Cos Mickey…" she stopped, turning.

"No." he knew it was stupid. He should let her run back to Mickey, let her live her life, and live his own, and be happy with the memories they had, and hoping that one day she could come back. But that little bit; that little human bit, the bit which couldn't let her go, nagged at his conscience. She's there. Your Rose. Nothing much else seemed to matter at the moment. So for once, he followed his hearts, even if she would never know.

"The Doctor."

She spun back around, both eyebrows raised sceptically, the wind blowing her hair out of her face delicately. God she was beautiful.

"The Doctor?" she repeated. "Look if I wanted someone making up daft names, I'd go back home with Mickey."

"Really." If he kept this up, he was going to end up bawling his eyes out. "I'm the Doctor, and…I miss you."

She was starting to feel sorry for him. That was even worse. He could see the pity in her brown eyes, that instinct that Rose had, how she could never bear to see someone in pain. How she _cared._ He felt hot tears spring to his eyes, and a lump in his throat.

"Yeah…um…" he tried.

"Are you…?"

"I'm always alright." He told her, his voice breaking. He walked away, lost in memories, the first tear running down his face.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………...

Donna looked up as the TARDIS door creaked open. Finally.

"What the hell have you been doing?" she asked him crossly. "And why on earth are we _here_?"

She faltered as she saw his face.

"Doctor, what's up?"

"Nothing."

"Do I look stupid?" Donna asked "You walk in, looking like a wet weekend…"

"I'm-"

"…Looking as though the worlds gonna implode, has been invaded by every alien in the universe, and somebody has died. And you've definitely been crying a lot." She paused for breath "So _don't you dare _tell me you're fine."

He gave her a watery smile. The most fantastic thing about Donna was that she was so open, she said what she thought, and she took no nonsense from anyone, not even 900 year old aliens. She knew her own mind. He sighed. He really couldn't hide it, especially not from Donna. The TARDIS lights winked encouragingly, as he walked slowly over to a chair and sat down. Donna copied him a bit more tentatively than usual.

"OK, then, spill."

He opened his mouth to speak.

"OH MY GOD!!" Donna exclaimed suddenly, jumping up so fast she crashed into the console. "It's Rose isn't it?" she added, slightly more sensitively.

Slowly, he nodded, meeting her gaze more than a little guiltily.

"Yeah."

"See! I mean yeah you're a weird alien person, but you're the same as any guy inside! And you are such an idiot! You know about timelines and all that stuff!"

"I know, I know, I just had to see her."

"So we can go now? Doctor I know you miss her…"

"We can't. I've gotta see her again if only to wipe her memory. I told her my name, and she musn't know that before she meets me."

Donna slapped herself in the forehead, exasperated.

"I take it back," she told him exasperatedly "You are not like an ordinary person at all. You have gone utterly insane."

He grinned at her.

"Oh yes."

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………...

It was well past eleven now. Rose lay in bed curled up in the cocoon of her duvet, thinking. Mickey was long gone, and the only sound she could hear was that of the TV humming down the hallway. She sighed and rolled over, trying to get to sleep. She couldn't stop thinking about that man. The Doctor. Who on earth was he? And why had he specifically come to see her. He seemed heartbroken about losing someone, and her own heart ached to help him. He said he missed her. That was the strangest part, because she knew she had never met him before. Yet a part of her told her inexplicably that he had mistaken her for some other girl, that he missed her. But how? That was impossible. She would have to try and find him again, and talk to him properly. She pulled the covers closer around her. When she finally got to sleep all she could see was those eyes filling with tears, and the powerful raw emotion that emanated from them.

**To be continued… (hehe that sounds like the end of a heroes ep! And…(yay!) shall be watching that 2night). :D**

**rose4thedoctor4eva**


	4. Determination

What the hell had he done this for

**I did this when I was cough doing maths revision cough. So therefore if I fail tomorrow, I shall blame you lot. :D Sorry if it's a little confusing, me and my friend Tom were having a very circular conversation about whether someone died in a Doctor Who episode or not cause it never happened. So yeah…………….. smiles**

What the hell had he done this for? He really was and idiot, Donna was right, and a grieving lovesick one at that. This was so human. This was the sort of thing humans did, like Rose, when he took her to see her dad. But he didn't want to think about that. He just had to go to her, tell her what he had to do, and do it. And walk away.

He didn't have to find her this time. There she was, running towards him, her hair streaming behind her like liquid gold, he face lit up with a huge smile. He really couldn't help himself. He beamed right back.

"Mornin' Doctor!" she said brightly, stopping as she drew level with him. "You ok?"

"Yeah." It was better to lie through his teeth than say no: he didn't want to start himself off again like yesterday. _Just tell her you have to wipe her memory and get on with it_. Rose must have seen some of the mental battle going on, on his face, for she was peering at him, looking worried.

"Doctor, what you said yesterday – no ones always alright, and you certainly aren't at the moment…and it's got something to do with me, yeah?"

"Yeah." He couldn't disagree when she put it like that.

"Well tell me."

"I…I lost you."

Rose looked at him, understanding dawning on her features.

"In the future, we're like…"

"I wish." He laughed at the irony of it, three words, three little words, and he'd never had the courage to say them in two whole years. "No. We could've been. But I only worked up the courage when it was already too late. And then we ran out of time."

"Hang on…" Rose was trying to grasp the situation "So are you like from the future or…"

"Precisely. Which is why I have to…I have to wipe your memories of this. You mustn't remember any of this when you meet me."

"I want to help you find her." Rose said stubbornly, crossing her arms and frowning at him determinedly.

"Rose, but she is you."

"Not yet." Rose told him "I won't be her until I'm…

"19"

"...and she's the girl you fell for." Rose finished. She looked up at him, he brown eyes radiating determination. She was standing there, chin in the air, desperate to help him. She really was brilliant. How had nobody noticed just _how _fantastic Rose Tyler was before he did. In a few years time she'd think of herself as an ordinary girl, with a dead end job, and no prospects. How could anyone let her believe that?

"I'd let you help, but I can't. You're stuck in a parallel universe, and even if we got round that, you musn't meet yourself." He grinned "You did that once. Held yourself as a baby. Not good. _Massive _time wound type thing, basically made it bigger, and I got _got_ by Reapers."

"Well, I'll just be careful not to hug myself, yeah?"

He rolled his eyes.

"You are completely impossible, Rose Tyler!"

**To be continued some more…What is the Doctor gonna do?! :P**


	5. Onwards and Upwards

**Final chapter! I just read a thing, some of you might have heard, that bebo users get to pick a slang term to be in the next edition of the Collins dictionary. Now, I use bebo, but I haven't even heard of half of these terms that all young people are meant to have used. The ones I have heard of are distinctly chavvish. Why do people think all young people are chavs. I'm not, and I don't know anyone who is. Anyway, chav rant over. Enjoy le chapter.**

The next time the Doctor appeared through the TARDIS doors, he was looking considerably more cheerful, but there was something suspicious about his cheerfulness. Donna was pretty sure there was only one thing that would make him look so cheerful.

"What's happened now?" she half shouted at him, then realised that was probably uncalled for, and lowered her voice a bit "Why do you look so happy?"

"She is amazing! How come no one noticed before?" he almost skipped around the console, flicking a couple of buttons absently as he skidded to a halt behind Donna, who turned looking severely at him. "I…um…had a proper conversation with her. And she um…wants to help me find her!"

Donna rolled her eyes. Brilliant as he was, talking to the Doctor could be like talking to a three year old.

"Uh, Doctor…small problem? We can't get through to her universe."

His face fell abruptly, and Donna wished she hadn't said anything.

"I know." he said, more gloomy "but still…"

Donna smiled sympathetically, and put an arm around him. Despite his cool couldn't-care-less exterior show he usually wore, he was lonely and sad, and sometimes he just really needed a hug. And despite her own lippy exterior, she wanted to help him, not hurt him. She took a deep breath.

"Doctor, I know you miss her. But…talking to her past self isn't going to help, is it? It's going to make things worse for you, because the more you are reminded of her, the more you'll realise you've lost. And…she'd want you to be happy, I'm sure she would. So do I." Donna grinned "You just sit around moping all day!"

The Doctor nodded slowly, got up, and headed for the TARDIS doors, idly patting Donna's shoulder as he passed.

"Thanks, Donna. I know it's no fun for you, me moping around." He smiled momentarily, then disappeared through the wide wooden doors.

Walking down the crowded street, the Doctor mulled over what Donna had said. He needed to erase this Rose's memories, because he knew she was completely right: he would just cause himself more pain later. Looking down at his filthy white converses, he realised that he had no idea where he was, and even less idea where Rose would be at this time of day. At school, probably. He was about to turn back and attempt to find the TARDIS again, when a familiar voice caught his attention. Blimey. That girl had some kind of magnetic force.

"Hey Rose!" he called back, letting a smile creep over his face. He couldn't help it. It was just so good to see her. She grinned back as if she was pleased to see him, too. "Rose. I have to erase your memory. Now – sorry"

She stared at him as if he were insane. Which he was. But not for erasing her memory. He was insane because he would be happy not to, and if he didn't do it now, he would lose any resolution he had.

"Why?" Her brown eyes met his, and his hearts skipped a beat.

"Because," he paused "because otherwise I won't be able to. All I want to say, before I do this, is that I want you to know that I loved you more than anything, and I am just so sorry that I never told you when I had the chance." The Doctor took a deep breath which shook a little as he drew it in. "Do you trust me?"

She nodded

He oh-so-gently placed his hands on the sides of her face, then dipped into her mind. It wasn't hard to find the memories with him in. They were the brightest and freshest, the newest. He removed them from her mind, and caught her as she slumped to the ground. Memories of when she had nearly been killed by the time vortex rushed to the surface, as he laid her down gently. The Doctor desperately wanted to stay to see if she was ok, but he knew he couldn't afford her to have any memory of his face, and hurried away.

Donna paced around the TARDIS, wondering if the Doctor would actually be able to remove himself from Rose's memories, or if he just wouldn't have the strength. She could sympathise with the whole losing-someone-you-love situation, considering that a year and a bit ago her fiancé had tried to feed her to a giant spider. Despite the fact that he had attempted to kill her, she still felt sad sometimes, thinking about his death. How the Racnoss had killed him, despite his alliance with it. Maybe something that stung worse than that, were the memories of Lance telling her that he didn't love her, that it was a pretence. It wasn't like she hadn't heard it all before, but it still stung. She had loved that guy to bits. It was slightly before this that she had met the Doctor the "Martian" as she had called him. Anxious to get back to her wedding, Donna realised she probably hadn't been overly sensitive about his lost friend, who she had finally discovered was called Rose. Since finding the Doctor again, he mentioned her little, but when he did take the liberty to tell her about one of their adventures, his face lit up, like he was whole again. Donna smiled. It was nice to see him happy, for once. Once, when he had said something jokingly about Lance, she had stormed off to her room, scowling. _At least the person he loves is still alive. At least she loves him back!_ Recently, however, Donna had stopped moping over Lance. After all there were some _very_ attractive blokes out there, and she lived in a ship that travelled through time and space! She could still sympathise with the Doctor, though. She could move on, but he couldn't. She supposed if Lance was still alive, then maybe she'd have more difficulty, too.

"Donna!"

A loud voice shocked her out of her thoughts.

"I've never seen you so quiet!" he announced, frowning at her. "You are exercising a lot of restraint today."

"Oi! Watch it spaceman!" Donna paused, guessing he was being so gobby to hide that he was upset. She did it all the time, after all "So…how did it go?"

"Oh, it was ok." His grin which he had worn faltered and died. "You know." He paused, then passed his tongue over his lips "So…where to next? There is this truly _amazing_ place I know. Planet. Blue trees! I know! Betcha never seen blue trees before, Donna Noble. Or we could…"

"Blue trees it is then, mister!"

He grinned, then spun away from her, crashing into the console with crushing force, running his fingers over the levers and buttons, pumping and pulling, flicking switches. Donna wasn't Rose, but she was a friend, a good friend, who deserved to see the universe. He flashed a smile at her.

"Onwards and upwards."

And the TARDIS lurched into action.

**Ta daaa!! I likes! Do you? Only one way to tell me! Review. Henry the review button is verrry lonely. :( poor Henry.**


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